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The Power of Play

10/9/2015

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A message from our Director 

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I’ll start this message with a story from the trenches. As a new parent, many years ago, I embraced our daughter’s desire to do extra activities like ballet, skating, music etc.  Even as young as preschool, she wanted to do everything that her friends were doing. If all the other families were doing it, it must be right, right? Before I knew it, she had an after school schedule that was presidential. That is, until I figured out what was driving this….. FOMO! The term (Fear of Missing Out) hadn’t been invented yet, but clearly our little girl didn’t want to miss out on anything. And frankly, neither did I. I couldn’t help but think that I would be a negligent parent if I didn’t allow all these “opportunities”.   It took me a long time (and three more children) to stop the insanity.

The problem with too many programmed activities is that children never learn how to be resourceful. They forget how to play and they get bored easily. So we add more programs and the cycle continues. When our family scaled back in activities, sure, the days seemed long initially. But then almost magically, the children figured it out, inventing games, fantasy lands, characters, some kind of ridiculous language….they played together, alone, and with friends, drawing pictures or making music with pots and pans, and it was a truly joyful time for everyone. 

When children are allowed to play freely, they learn to explore and solve their own problems and develop their own interests.  They feel in control of their own lives and responsible for their own enjoyment.  Independence and self-esteem are the natural results.  Research bears out that children’s freedom to play and explore on their own, without adult direction, has greatly declined over the years.  It is interesting that we are now seeing more children with anxiety and depression.

It takes courage and resolve to say “no” when your child wants to do what his or her friends are doing.  As with most things, moderation is key. You will know in your heart makes sense in your family. Just remember that when it comes to extracurricular activities, less is often more.

Until next time...Leslie 
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